restructure

Osteopath: therapist who manipulates body structure.

I think my body is as hardheaded as my head
(obstinate & stubborn)
-In Spanish it would be´cabezona´ ( cabeza =head ), or in dutch ´koppig´ ( kop = head. Literally it would be ´head of animal´, although in some contexts it works fine for humans) -

I don't believe in the restructuring of my body, although I am baffled by the suggestion. I´ve grown up accepting the fact that some of my vertebrae are looking in other directions, -they re curious. And that it cost me great effort to stand up decently straight and not slouch like a pillow on sofas and floors. But now that I have problems walking long distances because of a relatively new injury, probably caused by years of walking on cardboard shoes, I figured it was time to act. The osteopath didn´t quite know what to tell me, she figures I either have several problem zones or they are all connected and she can´t see the whole picture yet. I don´t know if i can afford to have her look for the whole picture, but I promised myself i´d take better care of my body. ( The Mind has always been priority )
So i will go back. She said she relocated several parts of my body that weren't in place.
My spine is twisted like a birthday garland

Today i wrote a bit on the balcony while velum clouds covered the sun slightly. I want to try to finish this first essay on a thought that came up. I haven't written anything essayish in a really long time. I enjoy it but hardly ever finish anything, because i usually start arguing with myself up to a point that no statement can be made.
Also I think nothing is original. Followed by the realization that this thought is in itself hardly original.

Hopefully something will appear here one of these days. I´ve been wandering around on etymology and/or disease websites. I am obsessed with disease symptoms since I´m perfectly convinced I will get stung by a malaria mosquito and die of cerebral malaria. I mean i hardly survived a camping trip to Burgos. Other than that I feel like nothing is the same these days and somehow the same things keep coming back. Which makes us a kinda predictable and highly volatile species in my eyes.
Fascinating.

Some of my best etymology finds:
Dutch ietsisme (literally somethingism) an unspecified faith in a higher or supernatural power or force.
Other one here , my favorites: avocado & companion..( information on site not entirely reliable)

These days the visual stimulation has been overshadowed by language. I enjoy that intensely. Still here are some of the images that have painted my days:
Beautiful analogue photos here
And I happened upon this familiar work of Jesseca Ferguson:

she says:

´While some might consider me a photographer, I feel I am really more of an assembler of images and tableaux, which then come to exist as pinhole photographs of an interior landscape. The poetic aspects of pinhole photography are what draw me to it. Although the pinhole camera is “blind,” because it has no viewfinder or lens, I find that it “sees” in mysterious ways. The pinhole camera’s “sight” grants infinite depth of field to the object and images before it, thus allowing us to see the camera’s pinhole vision, which is characterized by the odd clarity of dreams or memory. Working without a viewfinder, I can’t know exactly what my pinhole camera will give me, thus my camera becomes my silent and enigmatic collaborator.Usually I work in my own studio, setting up arrangements of images and objects culled from my “museum of memory,” my personal collection of oddments, books, and artifacts. Using only natural light, my exposures often take several hours. I then contact print my images using 19th century techniques (or modern versions of antique processes) requiring ultra-violet light. My work is slow, hand-built, and cumulative, rather like the layering of dust or memories over time. ´-JF